If she's sexy and conservative, she must be dumb Ugh. I'm no fan of Ann Coulter, but I'm so disgusted by this article slamming her that I can barely see straight. Salon's Charles Taylor is usually level-headed, and he makes some very valid criticisms -- mainly that Coulter is a smartass who often forgets to think before she speaks. But why is she that way, you ask? Because she's naturally reactionary? Because she knows what plays on talk shows? Because she delights in sarcastic humor? No, it's because she's that bitchy blonde cheerleader who rejected all the sensitive liberal geeks like Taylor in high school:

[Coulter is] a freedom fighter in Manolo Blahniks, tirelessly pointing out the liberal propaganda that threatens free speech and the Republic itself, preferably in a chic and simple outfit that will take her from policy meetings to television interviews to cocktail parties without missing a beat of her busy day. ... Nobody does smug like Ann Coulter. Like the other [conservative fembot] sorority gals, she is always ready to flash a look of incredulity at anyone stupid enough to hold beliefs different from her own. ... It's politics and history and culture as a clique, a coffee klatch, a night spent mooning with your girlfriends over "An Affair to Remember." And it's fatal to Coulter's efforts to represent herself as a thinker. ... [T]he smugness and conspicuous lack of experience and seasoning in these telebimbos should give conservatives pause. Coulter and her brood could benefit from a little conservative ideology themselves. Arguing with them is like paying attention to disobedient children. They should be treated like spoiled brats who mouth off. Put them over the knee, paddle their fannies, tell them to wipe that smirk off their face and to speak up only when they've learned something about the world.

If that isn't the most breathtakingly sexist language I've ever read, then someone paddle my fanny. Women -- especially the good-looking ones -- should be seen and not heard "until they've learned something about the world," i.e., until they've gone liberal and grown out their armpit hair. I feel ill.